belts, etc

Belts are most interesting.

I hate them.

Why wear a belt when you have hips? Hence, I avoided it for a while. But then came the hipster jeans. And then came the stretchy jeans. Alas. When you are running to catch the train, the last thing you want to worry about is your pants.

Belts are uncomfortable. They might perhaps help hold up your pants, but if your pants are large enough to need a belt, then the belt loops are invariably placed too far apart. Then you find yourself, like me, scrunched up with the waist of pants poking out from under the belt. That's right, Laura the scrunchie.

I went for years without ever wearing belts. I hated tucking shirts in as well. To me, belts and tucked-in shirts are in the same evil family. Shoulder pads are somewhere in that family tree as well.

I had a series of unloved belts as a child. There was the black braided one that I never wore. The navy blue fabric one that was a hand-me-down. Maybe one of my sisters wore it? I know not. Then there was the black leather belt that literally had my name imprinted on it. I think everyone in my family had one with their own name on it. I forget whose idea that was. But I rarely wore that belt either.

My dad always wore suspenders. One year for Christmas he got white suspenders with cows on them. They were awesome. One of my favorite things to do (as a child, I should point out! But to be honest, its still a favorite thing even if I resist doing it) was to tighten his suspenders while he was sitting down. They were always really loose when sitting you know, so I was only trying to be helpful. I also liked to re-adjust the loose fabric of his collar shirts so it puffed out in the wrong place. Suspenders make it really easy to design special puffs, you know.

So then I did eventually get a belt in college that was for my hip rider pants. I actually wore it too. For a while, anyway. That was years ago though. (like...7)

I was realizing today that all the jeans I own at the moment require a belt for one reason or another. In fact, I am wearing a belt at this very moment. How could this have happened?

Yesterday I was wearing pajama pants. (Pajama pants is for lack of a better word. What are they? They are NOT actually pajamas. They are loose, stretchy, and comfy. Are they lounge pants? Comfy pants? Jammi pants? I know not.) But they are way too long and were dragging on the wet sidewalk as DH and I were walking somewhere last night. As I was pulling them up a bit, DH decided it was time to sing the "pants on the ground" song.

You know I have never seen American Idol, not even once? Apparently this "pants on the ground" song is a big hit.

Apparently, belts help keep your pants off the ground.