The only joke I know

It’s true. I only know one joke. To assume I am not funny because of it (hmm, is that right? maybe it is cause and not effect), however, would be a mistake. I am funny. I say funny things. I say non-funny things in funny ways. But even were that not the case, my one joke is stupendous enough to withstand any harsh criticism of its loner status.

The Joke:

Teller of joke: Do you know what a twip is?

Tellee: No, what is it? [In my experience, this line is most often not performed to satisfaction and one is obliged to prompt the tellee to the correct response.]

Teller: A wide on a twain.

I think the source of this joke was dear mummy. Maybe.

Other jokes from my childhood I only remember vaguely. There was one joke that had to do with silverware… “a knife an a fork! a knife and a fork!” But I don’t think that was the main point of it. Then there was a joke about 10 cent oranges, about which I remember nothing else, except that they were “very very fresh.” Another had to do with a pink house and pink books with pink paper and pink words. I don’t think the pink joke was very funny.

Feel free to post these jokes if you recall them…

As a final point, which is hardly worth mentioning, I do remember a knock knock joke, but I don’t count it because knock knock jokes are excessively lame and stupid.