a brit am i

Now there are four people who have commented on my "accent."

Person 1--Male. Tall. Odd.
David: Did you get your accent from your mom?
Me: What accent?
David: Your british accent. It comes and goes.
Me: I don't have a british accent. And what would my mom have to do with it?
David: Yes you do. And your mom is british.
Me: No she isn't.

Person 2--Female. Not odd at all.
Me: David thinks I have a british accent. That is so funny.
Sam: You do. It comes and goes.

Person 3--Male. Sat down next to him at a wedding, and this conversation took place within 30 seconds.
Forgothisname: What's your accent?
Me: I don't have an accent. I'm not from anywhere that has an accent.
Forgothisname: Yes you do. It sounds british.
Me: People keep telling me I have an accent. I don't have an accent.
Forgothisname: Maybe it's more of a poetical enunciation.

Person 4--Female. Russian. It took place last Sunday within 30 seconds of meeting her.
Olga: Are you english?
Me: No, why?
Olga: Sounds like you have an accent.
Me: Funny, you're not the first person to say that.
Olga: Are you trying to have an accent?
Me: Er..no... [did she really just ask me that?]

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And so. I repeat, I don't have an accent. So what if I read too much and never say "my bad." I am not related to anyone with a british accent.

Latest blunder: I substitute tutored a 3rd grader tonight. She finished her homework and so we started to play SORRY. I was winning, and when our time was up she got up and glared at me. I said, it was nice to meet you. She said, it wasn't nice to meet you, and ran out. Nice.
Note to self: let third graders win board games in future.